Sunny Florida was anything but sunny this past Sunday, and so my hubby and I settled in for some Netflix. Cruising through the “things you might like” section we stumbled across a series called Sex/Life. Sounded like something we would enjoy, so we clicked to watch.
What is so interesting about this show, is how it portrays the importance of sex and intimacy in any solid relationship. The summation of the show is that this beautiful woman, who appears to have it all, is actually miserable in her marriage. She loves her husband and is very attracted to him, but he has become caught up in his role as father and provider and has lost interest in her as a woman.
The show hones in on the sexual appetite and desires of this married woman. After 8 years of marriage, she begins to fantasize about an old lover with whom she had intense sex. Like this is missing from her life, it becomes a constant thought for her. She decides to write about her past relationship with her former erotic boyfriend and her husband finds and reads it. Rather than lashing out, he tries to recreate this erotic and reckless sexual behavior to satisfy her. What it made me realize, was how he needed to remember that other men found his wife sexually desirable for him to look at her this way as well.
Watching this show made me think about why swinging is so helpful for some relationships. It doesn’t matter how attractive or sexy anyone is, after a while, people want something different. It is not because couples stop loving each other, but rather because people get bored. Swinging allows couples to get back to a place where they can be sexual again.
There is something about the lifestyle that brings couples closer. Men watch their wives ( and vice versa) flirting and teasing other men and it puts them in a new light. All of the sudden you see your significant other the way you remember them when you met. It creates a new spark and you find yourself enjoying watching them play with others, knowing that you will get to do so afterwards.
The lifestyle brings passion back into relationships that originated with this. It brings couples to remember that work and family and paying bills is only one piece of who you are. The other piece is this naughty couple who are looking for fun together. Sneaking around, laughing at almost being caught by vanilla friends and family who would never understand. The bond it creates strengthens what you already have together. Even when couples opt to enjoy the lifestyle without swinging. They benefit from the atmosphere which is warm and sexual.
I imagine if the couple in this show were to try swinging. It seems that they could have it all. Rather than one of them looking outside of their marriage to fulfill their needs, they would be looking together. The lifestyle is not for everyone but I personally believe many couples would benefit from it.
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