I would be willing to bet that almost every person in the world who looks in the mirror sees at least one flaw with their body. For some people, it might be nothing more than a small blemish, while for others, it can be a major disfigurement. This can be a serious impediment in enjoying the lifestyle.
Every person in the lifestyle would like to have a healthy self image but for some, it can be a real struggle. For these individuals, the issue is about more than an extra five pounds or a breakout the day of an event. The types of individuals I am talking about have more serious conditions which makes removing their clothing a whole different ballgame.
Body disfigurement is when a person’s appearance has been deeply and persistently harmed, such as from a disease, birth defect, or wound. People with these types of conditions can suffer greatly with self image, making the lifestyle a genuine struggle for them.
Imagine how difficult everyday life is when dealing with these types of issues. Now think about how much more difficult a social situation might be. Consider how hard it is for them to have to undress in public and how much harder it is for them to feel confident enough to try to swing.
Whether the person is an amputee, has a visible skin condition, or large scars from surgeries, disrobing can be difficult. While we would like to think adults would be kind enough to treat them the same as we would anybody else, this is not always the case. The last thing anyone with this type of issue wants is for others to stare.
Perhaps the best way to try to mask some of these issues is to wear items of clothing or lingerie into the playroom. Discreetly covering scars or some deformities can be more easily achieved than others. Amputees can make use of towels or robes to cover the affected limb. This can help ease their discomfort in front of others.
While this might solve their discomfort somewhat, there is the still the issue of playing with others. Having worked with people with disabilities and physical deformities in the past, I know how difficult these situations can be for them under normal circumstances. The lifestyle is an extreme example of an obstacle for them to overcome. Even if they are totally comfortable with their bodies, others might not be. So how best to handle this?
Some people might prefer to say something up front so there are no surprises and they can gauge the comfort level of a potential play partner. Others might prefer to attempt to conceal whatever they might have. It is an individual decision that each person must decide upon. Regardless of how they approach this, there is no doubt that they are hoping for an understanding and compassionate playmate.
If you find yourself in a position where you are either playing or about to play with someone who has a genuine body issue, try to see things from their perspective. Reacting to a person with any type of disfigurement with shock or disgust is both cruel and immature.
Always be respectful of everyone and remember that people have to go through things that perhaps you have been lucky enough to avoid. Between burns, cancers and accidents, many people will have some type of visible scars or deformities.
To ease the anticipation of how others might respond to you if you have a disability or condition of any kind, it might help to meet people online first. This gives you the opportunity to weed out those who can’t handle things like this. It can always be a footnote in your profile, or simply mention it to those you communicate with that you are interested in meeting in person. This way if someone agrees to meet you, you know they have no issue with it.
Most people who decide to be in the lifestyle with body issues such as these are pretty confidant people. They are willing to put themselves out there knowing that others might reject them. Can you do me a favor? If you encounter someone with any kind of body issue, give them a break. Kindness goes a long way to helping others feel good about themselves.